By Synthesis on Tuesday, June 11, 2002 - 03:31 pm: Edit

All Hail King Buzzo
The Shot-Callin', Big-Ballin' Frontman, Buzz Osborne, on the Novelty of Career Suicide & the Problem with Rock Stars.
by Max Sidman

There isn't much that The Melvins haven't done, as far as rock music goes. Buzz Osborne, the band's frontman, leader and self-described dictator, can say "been there, done that" to just about every festival, show, band and genre of rock that has come and gone since the band's inception in the mid-1980s, and though the group has never really hit in the mainstream, it's probably for the best. Quite frankly, the mass populace isn't ready for what The Melvins have to offer: pure rock music, original and honest in form and just fucked up enough to attract open-minded fans while spurning those with more conventional tastes.

This rock three piece's career has been long, and has seen its fair share of ups and downs, places on major label rosters and times of independence. Of course, for a group whose fan base has always been small but loyal and vocal, and whose drive has always been for the love of the music, not having a home, contractually speaking, isn't such a bad place to be. For instance, the group is currently releasing an album trilogy on the small, Bay Area-based experimental rock label Ipecac Recordings, with no plans to remain on the indie's roster after the third record drops. Other than the current project, The Melvins are beholden to no one.

"We're free agents, we're not signed," guitarist/vocalist/Mr. Melvin himself, Buzz Osborne, tells me from his home in Los Angeles, literally hours before the band begins an extensive U.S. tour this summer. "It's good, but it's not the greatest situation, financially, that you could ever be in. We're not a bunch of drug addicts, though, and we don't have a bunch of expensive rock star habits. And we're willing to work, so maybe we can make it happen."

At this point, it's pretty obvious that the Melvins are well beyond just trying to make it happen. Frequently billed by publicity types and fans alike as "Kurt Cobain's favorite band," The Melvins have maintained a strong underground-type following throughout the world as a mind-blowing live band, and spend their fair share of time on the road. This past summer kicked off a long stint of touring for The Melvins, beginning with a 66-show, 78-day tour of the U.S.-just the first pass around the country. But touring, along with everything else, helps keep the band's name out there, and after all, it is the live show that really blows people away.

"We're gonna do our part to extend ourselves as much as possible," says Buzz. Given the massive recording and touring schedules the band has undertaken in the last year, extending themselves is exactly what the band is doing. The group's latest studio effort is the aforementioned trilogy, three albums released within six months, what Buzz calls "the band's quest to commit career suicide." The first of the three, The Maggot, dropped in June, showcasing a collection of furiously heavy tunes, epic metal ballads and some stuff that goes beyond hardcore, to a realm of heavy metal musical tenets and individual thinking that The Melvins are no strangers to. The trilogy's second release, The Bootlicker, hit the record store racks two weeks ago, and represents a departure from the metal madness of The Maggot.

"When you hear the next one, it's so different that you're not going to believe it," says Buzz, after asking me if I'd heard the first release, and beaming about the differences between the two. "It's so weird, man. I mean, it's still got a twisted edge to it, like you'd expect it would, but it's not even like the same band. Compared to The Maggot, it's night and day, which it really what I wanted to do."

"Then the third one-The Crybaby-has a whole bunch of guest stars on it," he continues. "That'll be out in the fall, and ooh, it'll be a weird one-['70s teen idol] Leaf Garrett is doing [Nirvana's] 'Smells Like Teen Spirit' with us, the Tool guys are on there, Mike Patton, Kevin from The Brutal Truth, David Yow from The Jesus Lizard..."

As Buzz trails off trying to remember who else appears on The Crybaby, the trilogy's third installment, I start to wonder if there is some point to all of this, some grand scheme, a reason that Buzz and his band-mates-drummer Dale Grover and bass player Kevin Rutmanis-are attempting to commit "career suicide," as he so deftly puts it.

"I just wanted to do something weird and far-out and strange. I don't know what I'm going to do after this. I think I've covered it all. What next? I'll think of some other fucked-up thing to do, definitely," says Buzz, who says he sees a little poetic irony in the release of the trilogy's last installment. "The 'Teen Spirit' thing will be the perfect capper for the '90s-doing that song with that guy-it's perfect! I couldn't think of a better way to end this decade, especially with Kurt [Cobain] as the poster boy for Rolling Stone magazine as Artist of the Decade. I don't know how I could do anything better."

As the frontman of one of the most daring bands to ever take music to that grinding, sonic level, Buzz is known throughout the music community, and The Melvins are nodded to by just about every other hard rock band that has come and gone over the last decade. As veterans of the over-hyped Seattle scene of the early '90s, veterans of the Los Angeles and San Francisco music scenes, and veterans of traveling and playing music throughout the country, Buzz and The Melvins are a well-known musical terror.

Mr. Bungle and Faith No More frontman and solo freak Mike Patton recently employed Buzz to play guitar for a project called Fantômas, a single album of music so frenzied, scattered and hard core that, at times, it makes even bands like Melt Banana and The Boredoms sound structured.

"It was very strange," says Buzz about working with Mike Patton. "Mike's a good guy. He's very driven towards what he wants and there is no varying from that, which is kind of refreshing for me, 'cause you know, being the Adolph Hitler of my band and all... It's just nice to step back and be something else. And its such interesting stuff that I was more than thrilled to be a part of it."

Buzz tells me that, though he found working with Patton rewarding and interesting, the result is not an album that he can casually listen to, and one sampling of Fantômas' contents will tell you why: Amid Patton's cries, shrieks and screams lies an incongruent, frenzied patchwork of heard and heavy guitar riffs, grinding bass lines and from-out-of-nowhere drum licks.

"It isn't something that I would really sit down and listen to, but what I end up doing is playing it for people and saying, 'Listen to this shit! Can you believe this?!'"

But Patton isn't the only one who's tapped into the swift and blinding magic of The Melvins. A couple of years ago, the group was invited to go out on the road with none other than legendary rock 'n' rollers, KISS. And though the group jumped at the chance, you'd think that Buzz and the boys might look back on the experience with fondness. Buzz remembers it with only slight emotion.

"The tour was fun and they're a really nice bunch of guys, really down-to-earth," he says about the aging rock stars. "And those guys are real rock stars, have been for a long time. They've got a lot of money and are rock stars in the traditional sense of the term. And they're totally nice. That's what makes me hate these amateurish, rock-star, little fuckin' assholes around today, who act way worse than nice people like KISS."

I can't help but ask Buzz who he's talking about. The Melvins have been around for so long, have played with so many bands that trying to simply guess who the subject of this verbal caning was makes my head spin. Needless to say, he attempts to be careful in answering me.

"Oh, well you know... I don't know," Buzz says slowly, looking for a way to put it tactfully. "Just think back to all the bands we've ever toured with besides White Zomb... uh, I mean Tool, yeah. Tool is the nicest bunch of guys we've ever toured with."

I swear Buzz started to say something else, and cannot hold my tongue. "Did you let almost 'White Zombie' slip out there?" I tender.

"Oops..." he giggles.

So much for tact.