Melvins Interview circa 1989

[bUTTHOLEmAN]

Snipehunt magazine #5

The Melvins are the heaviest band ever to stalk this planet, Period. Combining the best elements of everything, they remain a band with a uniquely powerful and <unsettling> sound.  I caught up with them in their punk flophouse without any prepared questions and a host of jovial hecklers.
MELVINS 235 17th Ave San Francisco, CA 94121, Buzz-guitar Lori-bass Dale-drums

Snipe- What about the new record?
Buzz- What about it?
S- I dunno, what about it?
Dale- It's coming out very soon on Boner records. It's called Ozma, and it'll be a full length album.
S- How did you like playing in Portland?
D- We've never played ther before, so we wouldn't know how to gauge it, really, but for a Wednesday night, it seems like we got a pretty good response.
S- Hmmm... so you have lots of releases coming out.
B- Yeah.
S- Talk about them.
D- We've got a 7", and 8", a 12", a 15", an 18"...
B- We've got a couple of singles coming out right about now.
S- Any future tour plans?
B- No, none at all, but we might come up to Oregon again or go down to L.A. if we can get a few good shows.
Hecklers- Have you ever been possessed?
B- Not legally.
D- Oh yeah, we're coming out with a video pretty soon. It was shot up in Washington by a friend of ours while we were on tour. So that should be out some time.
H- Where will that be shown?
D- On Headbanger's Ball, right next to Winger and other "power ballad" bands.
S- How would you describe yourselves?
D- Well, he's got curly hair, stands about 5'9"...
B- He's describing ME, not himself. Cheater.
S- What kind of wrestling do you like the most?
B- WWF wrestling, because I don't consider wrestling a legitimate sport. I want to see the biggest circus I can, and that seems to be the one.
S- Who's your favorite wrestler?
D- Bundy, George Steele.
B- I like Bundy. Did you ever watch Portland wrestling?
S- Of course.
B- I used to watch that a lot. We got Portland TV up in Montesano.
D- That's right, we did get that up there.
B- I remember when Jimmy Snooka wrestled up there.
S- I saw him in Salem once.
D- Johnny Eagle, Bull Ramus...
B- Yeah, he was one of my favorites. So, how much money do you think we'd make in Eugene?
S- Oh, I don't know.
B- Take a stab at it. Five bucks?
S- Nah, maybe a hundred. A lot of people were pretty disappointed that you couldn't play there. Me for instance.
B- So people would come to see us?
S- Certainly.
H- You said you worked at a grocery store, right?
B- Yeah, I bagged groceries for a long time.
H- Did you ever have to go out and get all the carts from the parking lot?
B- Yeah.
H- Did anyone ever leave a dirty diaper in a cart? (Talk goes on about how this happened to more than one of the hecklers. Merely coincidence, or proof of aliens?)
S- Do you like playing live or recording better?
B- They're pretty different. Probably recording.
D- I like doing live recordings.
B- Recording is a lot different than playing live, but I like them both plenty. It's just that live, you get kind of frustrated by the sound sometimes.
H- Okay, I'm speaking to the people inside of Dale and Buzz. If you are there, you too are hypnotized and must answer all of my questions.
S- If I had any to ask.
H- Now they're going to come and grab your balls, Matt. That was a clever plot.
H- Are you aware that people have been using prophylactics for over 200 years?
B- That was a question on Jeopardy.
H- Yeah,with Alex Trebek- "No, I'm surry!"
S- What kind of music have you been listening to lately?
B- Hank Williams, Sr., NOT Jr.
S- Not Hank Rollins Jr.?
B- Definitely not. I always liked Black Flag DESPITE [sic] Henry Rollins.
D- I've been listening to PIL, 'Flowers of Romance'.
B- Jimi Hendrix, I've been listening to a lot of horror movie soundtracks in the last week or so. Friday the Thirteenth, the Thing, the Exorcist 2 is pretty good.
D- Cheap Trick, the Damned, Blue Cheer.
B- A lot of Talking Heads. 'Remain in Light', that is. Gang of Four, 'Solid Gold'. I'm sick of people talking about Black Sabbath with us. If they'd really listen to it they'd know, it's a crock.
S- What modern bands do you like?
B- I don't know. I can't think of any. I don't buy a lot of records.
D- I saw the Bad Brains last night, and they were great. I guess that counts.
S- Do you expect your musical career to take off soon?
B- I doubt it. We'll see. It would be nice to be able to tour and not lose a lot of clams while we're out there.
D- Hopefully, we'll be able to do that shortly after our record comes out.
B- We're working on material for a new album right now.
D- It's going to have songs with drum machines in it.
S- Do you have a lot of new songs?
B- Yeah, we've got ten new songs completed right now.
H- Is it true that Lori is Shirley Temple's daughter?
B- That's absolutely, positively true. The truth comes out at last.

<partial Kurt interview on another page>
Joe- I heard you were called Brown Cow, or something like that.
K- No, that was Buzz, Dale and I performing some of Buzz's Minutemen styled tunes. That was about two and a half years ago at the GESSCO in Olympia. I had a splendid time.

[Captain CoryCory]

Hilarious read, the sarcasm here is on fire! 

[(the) Razor]

Still the same old wit.

Would be interesting to see how far they thought Melvin's would go back at that point in time or if they had a plan B.