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MELVINS => Melvins Discussion => Topic started by: homeless_dad on January 26, 2012, 10:12:08 AM

Title: Melvins Limerick
Post by: homeless_dad on January 26, 2012, 10:12:08 AM
It came to me in a nightmare:

King Buzzo from Harbor of Grays,
played punk rock in his early days.
His Afro did grow,
songs tempos did slow,
and all kinds of hell he did raise!

Patent pending
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: homeless_dad on January 26, 2012, 11:02:59 AM
Matt Lukin would play bass with Buzz,
but he was out simply because
Buzz ran off his mouth.
The band did move south.
But soon Matt was marching to fuzz.
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: homeless_dad on January 26, 2012, 04:00:33 PM
Sir David Scott Stone of L.A.
"The Smell" is a place he does play.
He records with the boys,
and adds beautiful noise.
A member, I wish he would stay.
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: Uncle Fester on January 26, 2012, 08:15:37 PM
Quote from: homeless_dad on January 26, 2012, 04:00:33 PM
Sir David Scott Stone of L.A.
"The Smell" is a place he does play.
He records with the boys,
and adds beautiful noise.
A member, I wish he would stay.
:lol:
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: GrimReaper on January 27, 2012, 06:40:11 AM

Impressive.
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: anaconda on January 27, 2012, 07:32:05 AM
There was a young bassist named Matt,
when drunk his bass notes were flat.
Buzz and Dale soon said 'Hey Lukin,
stop all you're drinkin' and pukin'.
In a wink he was turfed just like that!

He claims he was fired without cause.
His statements cause many to pause.
On Facebook he constantly rants
proclaiming the Melvins pissants.
He now works with hammers and saws.


Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: homeless_dad on January 27, 2012, 07:38:26 AM
Quote from: anaconda on January 27, 2012, 07:32:05 AM
There was a young bassist named Matt,
when drunk his bass notes were flat.
Buzz and Dale soon said 'Hey Lukin,
stop all you're drinkin' and pukin'.
In a wink he was turfed just like that!

He claims he was fired without cause.
His statements cause many to pause.
On Facebook he constantly rants
proclaiming the Melvins pissants.
He now works with hammers and saws.

This is more historically accurate than mine I think. Kudos!
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: anaconda on January 27, 2012, 12:36:55 PM
" he now works with hammers and saws "

I'm still cracking up hours later.  :lol: :lol: :lol:
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: GrimReaper on January 28, 2012, 04:04:28 AM

Fucking awesome!
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: Idlehanz on January 28, 2012, 10:14:42 AM
Quote from: anaconda on January 27, 2012, 07:32:05 AM
There was a young bassist named Matt,
when drunk his bass notes were flat.
Buzz and Dale soon said 'Hey Lukin,
stop all you're drinkin' and pukin'.
In a wink he was turfed just like that!

He claims he was fired without cause.
His statements cause many to pause.
On Facebook he constantly rants
proclaiming the Melvins pissants.
He now works with hammers and saws.

Well done.  Completely true as well. 
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: homeless_dad on January 28, 2012, 11:23:38 AM
Joe Preston, a stalker-fan he,
a Melvin, aspired to be.
I am not sure why,
they hired the guy.
but Lysol is JOE's masterpiece.
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: anaconda on January 28, 2012, 01:38:51 PM
There was a bearded bassist named Joe,
to San Francisco he happily did go.
To record Lysol with the Melvins band,
though his tantrums they could not stand.
Too bad, his basslines were so nice and low.
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: jules on January 28, 2012, 01:44:05 PM
When Buzzo was down in Saint Bees,
He was stung in the arse by a wasp.
When asked, "Does it hurt?"
He replied, "No, it doesn't,
But I'm so glad it wasn't a hornet."
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: Dr.Benway on January 28, 2012, 02:36:50 PM
There once was a man from Gray's Harbor
Grunge he was said to have fathered
But like the red headed step
He ignored it and left
Moving ever upward and onward
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: Dr.Benway on January 28, 2012, 02:42:36 PM
alas, you are in luck
with words I am no longer stuck
though they are boring
and without a warning
it gives me a chance to say fuck(melvins)
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: anaconda on January 28, 2012, 08:17:01 PM
There was a bearded bassist named Joe,
to San Francisco he happily did go.
He recorded Lysol with the Melvins band,
though his tantrums they could not stand.
Too bad, his basslines were so nice and low.

They fired him one fateful day,
for the Melvins he'd no longer play.
With Thrones he now earns his wage
playing all alone up on stage.
Perhaps things are better this way.

Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: TheLegitMan93 on January 29, 2012, 01:27:55 AM
Quote from: jules on January 28, 2012, 01:44:05 PM
When Buzzo was down in Saint Bees,
He was stung in the arse by a wasp.
When asked, "Does it hurt?"
He replied, "No, it doesn't,
But I'm so glad it wasn't a hornet."

Best one by far.
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: Mad Arab on January 29, 2012, 06:57:36 PM
All Hail King Buzzo's rants
Onstage its mumus not pants
The fans are insane
Buzz calls them lame
Then admits he killed Kurt Cobain
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: homeless_dad on January 30, 2012, 12:12:43 AM
Name the songs (w/o cheating):

Like somebody took a coat hanger
Across the water what lies under
Los ticka toe rest
Tell it take no dess
It waits nothing ever you never
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: bUTTHOLEmAN on January 30, 2012, 02:07:43 PM
There once was a lady from Nantucket
Her favorite song was Honeybucket
...
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: jules on January 30, 2012, 02:14:54 PM
Quote from: bUTTHOLEmAN on January 30, 2012, 02:07:43 PM
There once was a lady from Nantucket
Her favorite song was Honeybucket
...

...But her husband bought her Shit Sandwich,
There was no music on it to hear, which
Made her repeatedly holler, "Oh, fuck it!"
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: bUTTHOLEmAN on January 30, 2012, 02:42:45 PM
 :P
=D>
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: jules on January 30, 2012, 03:50:22 PM
Gluey Porch Treatments and Ozma were frantic,
After Lysol they signed to Atlantic,
With Houdini and Stag,
Stoner Witch was less mad,
But later made madness with AmRep and Prick.

Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: norecess on January 30, 2012, 04:32:39 PM
dale crover
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: jules on January 30, 2012, 04:35:34 PM
Quote from: norecess on January 30, 2012, 04:32:39 PM
There was a young drummer Dale Crover
...........
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: norecess on January 30, 2012, 04:46:26 PM
some-where there was a king
ruling yet lacking one thing
this sparkling dutch clover
they named him dale crover
and mayhem is what they would bring
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: jules on January 30, 2012, 04:50:47 PM
 :lol:
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: Dr.Benway on January 30, 2012, 05:08:48 PM
Dale Crover, Dale Crover let Coady come over, to help him bang on the drum
Jarred exclaimed, Buzzo said "yay", this is a whole lot of fun
but one issue remained
simple and plain
"when cashing the check, no disrespect, we count as two you as one"
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: homeless_dad on June 12, 2012, 02:55:04 AM
How vast will the bassist morgue grow?
I guess in due time we will know.
But it has been fun,
to hear Trevor Dunn.
To keep him around wouldn't blow.
Title: Re: Melvins Limerick
Post by: jules on June 12, 2012, 01:12:09 PM
My favourite so far was Joe Preston,
I even saw him with no vest on.
His chest wasn't hairy,
But what was more scary,
Was his arse tattoo of Charlton Heston.