Melvins free-for-all-cage-match

[Pelican]

Okay, so it's very slow at work. My co-worker and I are going round for round on what musician could beat what other musician in a fight. Yep, it's that slow here.

So, we got to thinking, put the current Melvins line up in a cage match, every man for himself. Who's gonna win? Melvins Thunderdome.

[glen]

jared is a supreme combination of youth and size.

the safe money goes with the bassist.

[black stallion]

Okay, so it's very slow at work. My co-worker and I are going round for round on what musician could beat what other musician in a fight. Yep, it's that slow here.

Dale..double size and a lot of experience

http://it.youtube.com/watch?v=3MX60LCQkwg

[MIVSY]

this conjures up mental images of cody and jared as masterblaster.... respectively

he's just a child!!!

[glen]

this conjures up mental images of cody and jared as masterblaster.... respectively

he's just a child!!!

a man who can reference "two men enter, one man leave" is a man of my own ilk.

[Mad Arab]

Buzz has always seemed the most violent one with all his talk about punching 15 year olds at shows and what not. I'd say he has also had plenty of experience growing up in Montesano with rednecks picking fights with him.

I'd say Buzz would win the cage fight if he cut his hair since that would be an easy target.

This has been a cage fight prediction brought to you by Bas Rutten.

[mopafeena]

jared is a supreme combination of youth and size.

the safe money goes with the bassist.

I think i'd have to agree with you there Glen.

[dead mike]

if this battle royale somehow devolves into a rochambeau-fest, lorax would win by default. otherwise, she's an episode of COPS.

[Pelican]

Good discussion. 

I kept going round and round.

First I thought Dale, just because he's a big guy, his arms are like tree trunks and he's been beating the living snot out of the drums for over 20 years.

Then, I though Jared for sure, based on size alone. But, then I thought his size might also hurt him some, speed wise. Then I thought, well, he could just bear hug the piss out of anybody, or do some Andre the Giant stuff.

Then, I thought Buzz. Clearly he's more angry than all the others, there's definitely something to be said about "the fight in the dog". And, he can be pretty quick when he needs to, from what we've seen on stage. Also, he's built like a bull, he'd probably be able to take the most hits of anyone.

And, last, I thought I totally overlooked Coady. Yeah, he's the smallest, but he's clearly in the best shape. We know he's got amazing upper body strength, and is probably capable of some sweet Mohamed Ali type maneuvers.

In the end, I guess I don't have a real guess.  Good topic for killing time when it's slow for sure. 

[Живојиновић]

Coady is a certified martial artist. He'd filet anyone.

[Michael Jordan]

I think we should extend this to include past band members as well...       In this case I will go for Kevin cause he will be unpredictable in the ring.

[norecess]

I think we should extend this to include past band members as well... 

Sir DSS might not be the strongest build type, but he would kick any member's ass in a Robot Wars battle!

[Mad Arab]

Buzz would strangle each one with the Golden Gate Bridge cables he uses for guitar strings.

[Schnabster]

Who is most likely to bring tools in the ring?

[norecess]

Who is most likely to bring tools in the ring?

Adam Jones.