rate the records

[rictus]

My only question is, how did you get your username?

http://rumandmonkey.com/widgets/toys/namegen/15422/#.UvUS8aWBzIE

[LuckMach3]

Is the general consensus that HAT is their best effort? Would like to know which are Buzz n dales favs

There was a vote right before The Bride Screamed Murder came out.  H.A.T. won with Lysol coming in second.  I remember voting for H.A.T. at the time but would probably vote for Nude With Boots if we voted again.

There was an issue of CMJ where Buzz, Dale, and Kevin reviewed all of their records.  I think the first Jello album had just came out.  They mostly gave 6 out 10's to fan favorites like GPT, Bullhead, and Houdini while giving 10's to Lysol, Prick, Stag, Honky, The Maggot, The Bootlicker, CoD, H.A.T, and PORTE.  It's worth hunting down if you can find the interview.

[Satchel Paige]

UPDATE
i think i've done this before


Gluey Porch Treatments - 6
Ozma - 7
Your Choice Live Series - 8
Eggnog - 9
Bullhead - 9
Lysol - 9
Dale Crover - 7
Joe Preston -5
King Buzzo - 6
Houdini - 8
Prick - 7
Stoner Witch - 9
Stag - 10
Singles 1-12 - 8
Honky - 9
Alive At The F*cker Club - 6
The Maggot - 9
The Bootlicker - 9
The Crybaby - 8
Electroretard - 7.5
Colossus Of Destiny - 6
Millennium Monsterwork 2000 - 7
Hostile Ambient Takeover - 8
26 Songs - 7
Pigs Of The Roman Empire - 9
Never Breathe What You Can't See - 8
Mangled Demos From 1983 - 6
Sieg Howdy! - 7
A Live History Of Gluttony And Lust- 8
(A) Senile Animal - 8
Nude With Boots - 8
Chicken Switch - 7
The Bride Screamed Murder - 7.5
Sugar Daddy Live - 7
The Bulls & The Bees - 7
Freak Puke - 8
1983 - 7
Everybody Loves Sausages - 5
Tres Cabrones - ?
This Machine Kills Artists - ?

[))))((((]

10 Songs / 26 Songs - 7
Gluey Porch Treatments - 8
Ozma - 8
Your Choice Live Series - 7
Bullhead - 8
Eggnog - 8
King Buzzo - 7
Dale Crover - 8
Joe Preston - 6
Lysol - 8
Houdini - 8
Prick - 6
Stoner Witch - 9
Stag - 7
Honky - 7
Singles 1-12 - 6
Alive At The Fucker Club - 6
The Maggot - 9
The Bootlicker - 9
The Crybaby - 7
Colossus Of Destiny - 6
Electroretard - 8
Millennium Monsterwork 2000 - 6
Hostile Ambient Takeover - 9
Pigs Of The Roman Empire - 9
Never Breathe What You Can't See - 9
Mangled Demos From 1983 - 7
Sieg Howdy! - 7
Houdini Live: A Live History Of Gluttony And Lust - 9
(A) Senile Animal - 9
Nude With Boots - 9
Chicken Switch - 4
The Bride Screamed Murder - 8
Sugar Daddy Live - 8
The Bulls & The Bees - 7
Freak Puke - 8
Everybody Loves Sausages - 7
Tres Cabrones - 7
This Machine Kills Artists - 8
Hold It In - 7
Three Men And A Baby - 7
Basses Loaded - 7

[drumfreak:)]

i'll only do the ones I've heard

10 Songs / 26 Songs - 6/10
Gluey Porch Treatments - 9/10
Ozma - 9.5/10
Your Choice Live Series - 10/10
Bullhead - 9/10
Eggnog - 8/10
King Buzzo - 6/10
Dale Crover - 7/10
Joe Preston - 7/10
Lysol - 10/10
Houdini - 9/10
Stoner Witch - 9/10
Stag - 8/10
Electroretard - 7/10
Hostile Ambient Takeover - 10/10
Mangled Demos From 1983 - 6/10
Houdini Live: A Live History Of Gluttony And Lust - 9/10
(A) Senile Animal - 8/10
The Bride Screamed Murder - 8/10
The Bulls & The Bees - 6.5/10
Freak Puke - 8.5/10
Everybody Loves Sausages - 7/10
Tres Cabrones - 4/10
This Machine Kills Artists - 9/10
Hold It In - 6.5/10
Three Men And A Baby - 3/10
Basses Loaded - 7/10

[black stallion]

Three Men And A Baby - 3/10
Basses Loaded - 7/10

[drumfreak:)]

what 

[black stallion]

what 

looks like you are not into Three Men And a Baby.
don"t get me wrong,not my intention to act like classic fan boy: "hey are you crazy,how can you dislike such a masterpiece?" 
i still don't know what to think about that release

[Captain CoryCory]

Albums:
Gluey Porch Treatments:   
Ozma: 
Bullhead: 
Lysol: 
Houdini: 
Prick:   
Stoner Witch: 
Stag:   
Honky:   
The Maggot:   
The Bootlicker:    (it REALLY grew on me)
The Crybaby: 
Electroretard: 
Hostile Ambient Takeover: 
Pigs of the Roman Empire:   
Never Breathe What You Can't See:   
Sieg Howdy!:    (Voted Off The Island and Halo of Flies!)
(A) Senile Animal:   
Nude With Boots: 
The Bride Screamed Murder:    (It grew against me...)
Freak Puke:  (Took a bit of time to grow on me...)
Everybody Loves Sausages: 
Tres Cabrones: 
Hold It In: 
Three Men and a Baby: 
Basses Loaded: 

EP Releases:
Eggnog: 
King Buzzo:   
Dale Crover: 
Joe Preston:   
Echohead (Bootleg EP):   
The Bulls and The Bees: 
From The Nursery EP 
Making Love Demos: 
1983: 

Live Goodies:
Your Choice Live Series: 
Salad of a Thousand Delights: 
Tora Tora Tora: 
Alive at the Fucker Club: 
Colossus of Destiny: 
Millennium Monsterwork: 
Live At Slim's 
The End: 
A Live History of Gluttony and Lust: 
Boris The Pervert Bootleg 
Endless Residency: 
Sugar Daddy: 
Fantomas/Melvins DVD:   
Melvins vs. Minneapolis: You're kidding, right?
Pick Your Battles 

Misc. Releases
Leech (Bootleg compilation):   
Singles 1-12:    (Theresa gets a  )
Vs. Isis:   
The 13-CD Boxset: 
Chicken Switch: 
Pick Your Battles Outtakes 
Hiro Noodles Remix 
Mangled Demos from 1983:   
26 Songs:    (It grew on me)

Updated because we already have a captain 

[))))((((]

10 Songs / 26 Songs - 7
Gluey Porch Treatments - 8
Ozma - 8
Your Choice Live Series - 7
Bullhead - 8
Eggnog - 8
King Buzzo - 7
Dale Crover - 8
Joe Preston - 6
Lysol - 8
Houdini - 8
Prick - 6
Stoner Witch - 9
Stag - 7
Honky - 7
Singles 1-12 - 6
Alive At The Fucker Club - 6
The Maggot - 9
The Bootlicker - 9
The Crybaby - 7
Colossus Of Destiny - 6
Electroretard - 8
Millennium Monsterwork 2000 - 6
Hostile Ambient Takeover - 9
Pigs Of The Roman Empire - 9
Never Breathe What You Can't See - 9
Mangled Demos From 1983 - 7
Sieg Howdy! - 7
Houdini Live: A Live History Of Gluttony And Lust - 9
(A) Senile Animal - 9
Nude With Boots - 9
Chicken Switch - 4
The Bride Screamed Murder - 8
Sugar Daddy Live - 8
The Bulls & The Bees - 7
Freak Puke - 8
Everybody Loves Sausages - 7
Tres Cabrones - 7
This Machine Kills Artists - 8
Hold It In - 7
Three Men And A Baby - 7
Basses Loaded - 7
Crystal Fairy - 8

[some guy]

best (4.5-5)
lysol
hostile ambient takeover
bullhead
gluey
freak puke
the bulls & the bees
eggnog

excellent (4-4.5)
the maggot
stag
the bootlicker
pigs of the roman empire
ozma
honky
stoner witch

good (3.5-4)
the bride screamed murder
a senile animal
(a walk with) death
houdini
nude with boots
basses loaded

ok (3-3.5)
the crybaby
hold it in

bad (below a 3)
tres cabrones

unrankable/rateable in comparison to all of the above
colossus of destiny (on it's own: 3.5/5)
prick (on it's own: 3/5)
(a walk with) love (on it's own, probably 2/5)

don't really care to rate/rank anything else, everything above are the "core" releases as far as i'm concerned

[))))((((]

10 Songs / 26 Songs - 7
Gluey Porch Treatments - 8
Ozma - 8
Your Choice Live Series - 7
Bullhead - 8
Eggnog - 8
King Buzzo - 7
Dale Crover - 8
Joe Preston - 6
Lysol - 8
Houdini - 8
Prick - 6
Stoner Witch - 9
Stag - 7
Honky - 8
Singles 1-12 - 6
Alive At The Fucker Club - 6
The Maggot - 9
The Bootlicker - 9
The Crybaby - 7
Colossus Of Destiny - 7
Electroretard - 8
Millennium Monsterwork 2000 - 6
Hostile Ambient Takeover - 9
Pigs Of The Roman Empire - 9
Never Breathe What You Can't See - 9
Mangled Demos From 1983 - 7
Sieg Howdy! - 7
Houdini Live: A Live History Of Gluttony And Lust - 9
(A) Senile Animal - 9
Nude With Boots - 9
Chicken Switch - 4
The Bride Screamed Murder - 8
Sugar Daddy Live - 8
The Bulls & The Bees - 7
Freak Puke - 8
Everybody Loves Sausages - 7
Tres Cabrones - 7
This Machine Kills Artists - 9
Hold It In - 7
Three Men And A Baby - 7
Basses Loaded - 7
Crystal Fairy - 7
A Walk With Love & Death - 6 (Death-7 Love-5)
Pinkus Abortion Technician - 7

[kingdiamond]

All the albums rated with short reviews. In chronological order. No side projects, live albums, collaborations, special releases, or singles.

Early years:
Mangled Demos from 1983 6/10 - Early Melvins were straight up, fast hardcore punk sounding a lot like a mix between the Zero Boys and GBH. Outside of some standout tracks like "If You Get Bored" and "Forgotten Principles" this really doesn't stand out much from a million other similar sounding bands of that era. "Set Me Straight" and "Matt-Alec" show a glimpse of the slower, heavier sound the group would develop off of.
6 Songs/8 Songs/10 Songs/26 Songs 7/10 - Heavy, raw, grungy metal-punk. Some quality material but they were just getting started at this point.
Gluey Porch Treatments 9/10 - "Eye Flys" is one of the best opening tracks. Beginning with a slow, repetitive bass line with guitar feedback slowly creeping in until the song finally kicks in. The whole album is dirgy, heavy rock blending both metal (Sabbath, Venom) and punk (Flipper, Black Flag) to create a unique style.
Ozma 8/10 - Very similar to Gluey Porch except much weirder. Very unique timing and structures. The drums on here are impressive. Dale Crover is one of the greatest and most underrated metal/punk drummers and this is the album it really starts to show.
Sludge years
Bullhead 10/10 - The Melvins developed their own unique sound but this is where they first began to really hone their craft. "Boris" (the Japanese band, Boris is named after this song) is a sludge masterpiece. With the guitar tuned down to drop B (I think), the same slow riff is played a ridiculous amount of times but somehow doesn't get old. This record has weird timing and structures similar to Ozma but the songs are more developed. Mostly heavy sludge with a few moments of hardcore punk and experimentation. "Its Shoved" is upbeat and funky.
Eggnog 9/10 - The first couple songs are sparse, feed back drench, heavy and weird punk. The third is dirgy metal with a collage of some TV preacher at the beginning. "Charmicarmicat", the fourth and final track is slow and obscenely heavy, clocking in at nearly 13 minutes. Put it on if you want to scare people out of the room. 
Lysol (aka Melvins) 8/10 - Early drone metal. I don't know who invented drone metal but it may have begun here on the first two songs. Following up are covers of Alice Cooper and Flipper and then one more original. If you like Sunn 0))) and Earth check this out.
Major label years
Houdini 9/10 - Bands who were friends of and inspired by the Melvins, like Soundgarden and Nirvana blew up and became darlings of commercial radio and MTV back when they played music videos. The style was called grunge and it owed a lot of debt to underground bands like the Melvins so the Melvins got a major record deal for three albums before being dropped. Rather than trying to appeal to the record buying public, the Melvins just kept being the Melvins. Houdini is full of just great, straight ahead Melvins-style songs with a few more experimental track near the end. Definitely one of their better albums and a great place to start. "Honey Bucket", "Hooch" and "Night Goat" are essential tracks.
Prick 3/10 - This wasn't on a major and is a more experimental record with sound collages and inside jokes. I think I remember an interview where King Buzz said if you don't like this album then you're an idiot and don't understand their music or something to that degree. I think they would do some better experimental stuff down the road but to my ears this one's not so hot.
Stoner Witch 8/10 - Starts off with some straight ahead heavy rockers then gets a bit weirder in the middle with songs like the Tome Waits-ish "Goose Freight Train". Towards the end a few stellar drone metal jams and a couple experimental pieces. Very similar in style to Houdini.
Stag 8/10 - Last of the three major label records. Here the Melvins go all out in the studio, bringing in horn sections, sitars, lots of effects pedals, moog, bongos, and utilizing diverse styles. Very weird in a good way.
Experimental years
Honky 9/10 - On Honky they bring in the diverse styles but without the major label money to spend as much time in the studio and bring in a tone of instruments. Of the two albums, I like this one better because of how weird it is and probably because when I was younger I smoked lots of pot and tripped on acid around the time I bought this CD. "They All Must Be Slaughtered" opens the album with a strange atmospheric feel that either sounds like something that would be played in a planetarium or while you are entering Hell. I'm not sure which is more accurate. There are three heavier songs but the rest sounds like either Pink Floyd (after Syd Barrett but before Dark Side of the Moon) or Ween (the Pod or Pure Guava).
Singles 1-12 5/10 - The Melvins put out a 7" record with one song on each side once a month for a year then the following year release a double CD with all the tracks. This is a mixed bag of rare, unreleased, covers, live, and alternative mixes. I really like about half of this and the rest is just OK.
The Maggot 9/10 - The first of a trilogy of CDs put out at the same time. This one showcases the Melvins heavier side. So it is all down tuned metal and punk. Not a bad song on here and has both straight ahead and weirder songs.
The Bootlicker 8/10 - This CD shows off their more experimental side. There are no distortions on the guitar and none of the songs are really metal or punk. The stand out track, "Let It All Be" is chill fuck and sounds like they were listening to some Curtis Mayfield. The majority of the album borders of "indie rock" but is too weird for the squares that listen to that crap. Hearing some early Pink Floyd and early Funkadelic influences in here but I could be wrong. Hard to describe. Melvins but not playing metal.
The Crybaby 6/10 - The last CD in the trilogy is where they collaborate with a different musician on every song. There are some really cool songs on here but it is the weaker of the three. Standouts are Melvins covering classic country with Hank Williams III, doing a stoner metal ballad with industrial rock, pioneer, Foetus, and doing some punk with the singer of Jesus Lizard.
Electroretard 6/10 - Half the album is remakes of their older songs but with weird keyboard parts. The rest is cover songs including the punk classic, "Youth of America" by the Wipers and the instrumental "Interstellar Overdrive" by Syd Barrett-era Pink Floyd.
Hostile Ambient Takeover 10/10 - This is by far my favorite album with Kevin Rutmanis (bass player from the Cows who started with them after they got dropped by a major and ended with them shortly after this album). Great sludgy rockers and sound way different than anything they've done before and lots of noise, drum solos, and experimentation. Noisy feedback courtesy of not just the Melvins, but Sir David Scott Stone and the guitarist from Tool. One of their best albums.
Big Business years
(A) Senile Animal 9/10 - Rather than simply finding a new bass player, the Melvins recruited the bass/drum stoner rock duo, Big Business to join them. For the first time the Melvins not only have two drummers but start using vocal harmonies. The first album with Big Business is their best. Sandwiched between the sludgier songs are some straight ahead metal-punk similar to their first few albums. A must listen.
Nude With Boots 6/10 - Good album but sounds like mostly songs that weren't good enough for the last one. That is, besides the two openers which are two of their best songs of this era. The rest is still good but doesn't stand out.
The Bride Screamed Murder 8/10 - Starting off with a military cadence, oddly enough, the majority of the album is all killer no filler. Some of their heavier stuff with some interesting riffs, lots of cool drum parts, and vocal melodies much like Senile Animal except more sludge metal and less punk. The album ends with a sludgy version of the Who's "My Generation" and a traditional Irish ballads to showcase the vocal harmonies. Very odd but very enjoyable.
The Bulls & The Bees 6/10 - This EP continues the sound of the other Melvins albums with Big Business. Good straight ahead sludge metal//stoner rock with some moodier, atmospheric parts.
Lots of bassists years
Freak Puke 8/10 - Features Trevor Dunn of Mr. Bungle on stand up bass. No, not to pay rockabilly (thank god) but to play jazz. These are still heavy Melvins songs but with a slight jazz and psychedelic bent. Think electric era Miles Davis being injected into their sludge metal/weird punk sound. Not a bad song on here. Mostly heavy and weird with a few more chill, psychedelic parts and a Paul McCartney cover.  This line-up recorded and toured as "Melvins Lite"
Everybody Loves Sausages 5/10 - Each song is a cover song and a collaboration with a different musician so you have them doing Roxy Music with Jello Biafra (Dead Kennedys) and Venom with the singer from Nuerosis. I, mean, it is a fun album but not essential.
Tres Cabrones 9/10 - So on the demos before their first proper albums, like the straight ahead punk stuff, they had a different drummer and Dale Crover was not in the band. Around this time they brought him back and had Dale play bass to do sets of Melvins stuff from their punk days billed as "Melvins 1983". This album finds them releases an album of mostly new material as "Melvins 1983". Instead of playing in their punk style on these new songs, they play weird sludgy metal like modern Melvins. The result is surprisingly good. Surprising because Dale is such a good drummer and makes Buzz's offbeat playing work. Somehow this works too and actually sounds very unique while not really straying far from their sound. Lots of layers of guitar give this an atmospheric feel behind the heavy riffage. They throw in some goofy novelty songs and some old punk tunes to lighten the mood and the result is one of their best albums.
Hold It In - 7/10 - OK, so this is a Melvins album not as collaboration album (I chose not to include their collaborations with Jello biafra and Lustmord because it seems like separate entities) but this features not one, but two members of the Butthole Surfers. The bassist on the whole thing and the guitarist on some of it. The end result is some new Melvins classics that sound like the Melvins like "Bride of Crankenstein", a couple southern-tinged stoner rock songs, and a couple poppy indie songs.
Basses Loaded 7/10 - On this album, they bring in a different bassist for each track. Well, actually, the same bassist plays on two or thee tracks at a time but still. This includes their bass few bassists as well as the bassists from Redd Kross (who would go on to play on their next couple albums and possibly beyond) and Nirvana. This may be a gimmick or may be that they just don't have a permanent bassist at this point. I don't know. The end result is a sold album of trippy, weird sludge metal/stoner rock. Not a band song on here and the musicianship is top notch but doesn't stand up to some of the previous work. With that said, they have set high standards.
A Walk With Love and Death 8/10 - Double album. One record is straight songs, the other sound collage and experiments. The  straight up songs are moodier and darker than usual with the guitar mixed lighter with less distorted tones to highlight the bassist from Redd Kross playing, Dale's sparse, jazzier drummer, and Buzzo's moodier, less aggressive vocals. Still a heavy rockers but primarily a different sound like a more mature, improved upon take on Bootlicker. "sober-Delic (Acid Only)" is the highlight. The other half which is collages and what not is like Prick, only listenable. Like they finally made that style work.
Pinkus Abortion Technician 7/10 - Features both the bassists from Redd Kross and Butthole Surfers playing at once. They found themselves with two bassists so they kept them for this album and subsequent tour. Opens and closes with Butthole Surfers covers. In between are songs where the whole band takes part in the writing and vocals. With Pinkus from BH Surfers taking lead on the stand out track "Don't Forget to Breath" and a hard rock one later and Steve McDonald Redd Kross) taking lead on the power pop of "Embrace the Rub" which I heard was written for his punk band, OFF! but sounds like Cheap Trick playing hardcore (which is a great concept). They do a Beatles cover which I love (actually a cover of Moving Sidewalks covering the Beatles). Dale takes lead on a couple of these and they don't sound like the Melvins, more like neo-psychedelic. He did a solo record that has songs like these soon after.

9-10 = Amazing
7-8 = Great
6-7 = Really good
4-5 = Decent
3-4 = Meh
1-2 = Not so good
0 = Terrible

Can't wait to hear what they record next. Agree? Disagree?

[coodies]

Welcome kingdiamond! Didn't get to read all of your post yet, but what about the King Buzzo/Dale Crover/Joe Preston EP's? Though i guess they could be seen as collaborations with Dale Nixon and others.

[coodies]

All the albums rated with short reviews. In chronological order. No side projects, live albums, collaborations, special releases, or singles.

With the guitar tuned down to drop B (I think), the same slow riff is played a ridiculous amount of times but somehow doesn't get old.

Can't wait to hear what they record next. Agree? Disagree?

Totally agree with you on the Boris riff, i think we all do!

Also i agree that the Love disc is very listenable. I listen to it as much as the Death disc.